Astrology fans will be interested to know that the word ‘gullible’ doesn’t appear in the Oxford English Dictionary. They’ll also be interested in reading this week’s e2e.bike horoscope, specially for cyclists.
Raleigh (20 Mar–20 Apr) Your life will take some unexpected twists and turns today when you follow a Sustrans route.
Brompton (21 Apr–20 May) There’s always room in your life for someone new. Just as well, as there’s a motorbike in your ASL.
Specialized (21 May–20 Jun) Having Jupiter in Leo and Mars in Capricorn is bad enough, but that parked car in your contraflow lane is really infuriating you.
Kona (21 Jun–21 Jul) You tend to hide your light under a bushel. That’s why you won’t be able to find it when you bike home tonight.
Scott (22 Jul –22 Aug) Remember, there’s no such thing as bad weather, just smug people with better rainproofs than you.
Pashley (22 Aug–Sep) Your sense of humour will come into play today when you are run over by a coachload of reconstructive surgeons.
Cannondale (20 Sep–21 Oct) Remember there’s two sides to everything, except when taxis cut you up, which is more of a Möbius strip.
Thorn (22 Octr–21 Nov) You’ll come into some money today when a Securicor van reverses into you.
Dawes (21 Nov–21 Dec) Your wish is granted when the youth that stole your bike actually does get admitted to A&E with a bizarre and inoperable cucumber-related mishap.
Trek (21 Dec–20 Jan) There’s something in the air today, as you’ll find when you’re stuck at the lights behind that bus exhaust.
Giant (21 Jan–19 Feb) It’ll feel like you’re banging your head against a brick wall today when a white van runs you off the road and you bang your head against a brick wall.
Dahon (19 Feb–20 Mar) You don’t like change, so luckily for you the council’s new plans to improve cycling won’t make any difference.